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Bad hair restoration

August 29, 2012 By Trish Walraven 1 Comment

Last week, when the story of the botched fresco restoration in Spain went viral, I couldn’t help but wonder if this were the worst… or best… thing that had ever happened to the little church. I imagine the humiliation that the well-intentioned elderly parishioner has been feeling for her actions, and the fear that she will be sued for defacing this work of art which used to depict Jesus. She is reportedly suffering from anxiety attacks ever since her work became known.

But the Internet has turned her into a celebrity. Instead of taking the terrible painting at face value, it is becoming known as “a masterpiece of contemporary surrealism” and “perhaps its own kind of metaphor for modern man.” The church has become a tourist attraction, and there’s even a petition to prevent the fresco from being altered from its current state.

Best of all, the image has become a sort of meme, parody-ing its way into every crevice of Twitter and Facebook. If I were ever in Spain, I definitely would have to visit this fresco now and would be sad if it were ever restored in the normal convention.

And forgotten.

So when Jay Leno picks on a dentist for having bad hair, well, sometimes mainstream is the WORST thing you can be, and if there’s one thing Leno panders to, it’s the mainstream. What’s bad to the mainstream might be… postmodern !!! to those clients that you’re hoping to attract. Fellow dental blogger Mike Barr shares this video clip from The Tonight Show:

I

It’s not so bad. I mean, he’s an LVI-trained dentist, he’s a sculpted work of art himself – either you get him, or you don’t. Challenging? Yes. Dismissable? Let’s just say that I couldn’t leave this one alone:

 

Try as I might, I REALLY couldn’t leave it alone. Maybe the dentist would look better on the fresco itself????

 

On third thought, maybe it’s just best to preserve him in raw form and let the art speak for itself:

 

 

A big thanks goes out to Dr. G for being such a sport, knowing that it’s all in fun, and that anyone who picks on your hair is just jealous of your ripped body.

Filed Under: Fun, Humor, Marketing, News

How do you say “titillating” in Japanese?

July 27, 2012 By Trish Walraven Leave a Comment

If you think that this sort of thing doesn’t happen here in the US, you’re wrong. Only we don’t use boobs, because that’s too obvious (not to mention, quite unacceptable in our culture). When times are tough, desperation can drive dentists to other ethical edges, like hiring only hygienists that are willing to sell unnecessary treatment to patients… instead of their own bodies.

 

Japan’s zoftig hygienists keep dental patients coming back for tender, rubbing care

A clinic hires only cute women in order to attract patients

by Kazutaka Shimanaka, The Tokyo Reporter

I was so shocked, my jaw was hanging in astonishment. After all, I am a dental hygienist.”

So says Hiromi, a 24-year-old native of Shizuoka Prefecture, who, after graduating from an occupational training school, sought work in a Tokyo dental clinic as a hygienist.

“The head doctor’s a real slimeball, he only hires cute women in order to attract patients,” she reveals to Shukan Taishu.

Hiromi and three cute colleagues at the clinic filled out their tight, white uniforms, which in addition to exposing cleavage are also designed to show lots of leg.

“The clinic attracts salarymen working in the area,” she says. “We were told the uniform went with the job.”
About three months after she was hired, Hiromi was told by the doctor to emulate an older assistant named Megumi. While the sensei was filling a patient’s cavity, Megumi would lean up against their shoulder, giving them a generous feel of her substantial mammaries.

So good was her service that the patients were in the practice of requesting Megumi by name when they phoned for an appointment.

“Well then, I’ll give the patients an oppai (tittie) rub, the way Megumi does,” Hiromi informed her employer, who nodded in approval.

“Please do understand that in this business, times are hard, and that’s what we’ve got to do if we want to eat,” he explained. “If you emulate Megumi, patients will be able to disregard their pain, and want to come back again, you see? It’s a good form of communication beween the hygienist and the patients. And they’ll come back for more expensive treatments that aren’t covered by their health insurance.”

Actually Megumi was extremely talented in persuading patients for such elective services, cooing softly into their ear as she motherly nudged them, saying things like, “Rather than a silver crown, which will make you look older, a ceramic one will be much more attractive.”

But then something happened that discouraged Hiromi from working at that particular clinic.

It seems that while removing tar stains from the teeth of a middle-aged patient, he began returning the skinship, using his shoulder.

“He also began licking my finger while it was in his mouth,” she complained.

No longer able to restrain himself, the patient shifted to a full manual assault on her breasts, to which she loudly voiced her objections.

The head of the clinic, seeing that the patient was a good customer, told Hiromi to grin and bear it, and she resigned in a huff.

“The market for dental clinics in Tokyo is saturated, with more clinics than convenience stores. The situation has become severe,” says 26-year-old physician Mariko Yamashita. “What’s more, other businesses have been draining off dental patients, such as cosmetic surgeons who perform implants and estheticians who can do tooth whitening.”

In the past, dentists were once one of Japan’s “big three” most profitable operations, along with pachinko shops and obstetricians. But those days are gone for good.

“Patients who used to go running to their dentist whenever they felt a twinge of pain now refrain, or else only request work that is covered by their health insurance,” journalist Junji Maki tells Shukan Taishu. “That’s why I suppose clinics have become increasingly aggressive in efforts to attract more patients.”

A recent white paper on dental care reported that dentists need to treat 20 patients per day to break even, and that one dentist in five earns less than three million yen per year — less than the average cab driver.

Under such circumstances, the article concludes the emergence of doctors who expect hygienists to perform “breast massages” on patients may be a harbinger of a coming collapse in the dental profession. (K.S.)

Source: “Bijin shika eiseishi ga kokuhatsu! Shika iin no oppai eigyo gyoten jittai,” Shukan Taishu (August 6, 2012 issue, page 190)

 

 

Filed Under: Anecdotes, Money, News Tagged With: dental hygiene ethics, Japanese dentists, workplace harassment

Christmas in July

July 18, 2012 By Trish Walraven 2 Comments

Forget the holly-hauling, fruitcake-slicing, and carols at the spinet. We have a whole new way to usher in a little Christmas where we need it, right this very minute!

You just got a puzzled look on your face. This is stupid, you say. What do these small, wet disposable towels that you use to rub all the potential spittage off of your x-ray sensors and keyboards have to do with Christmas?

Maybe a little of my rusty singing will be enough of a hint:

Here comes Sani-Cloth, here comes Sani-Cloth. Right down Sani-Cloth Lane. ♫

Take your face out of your palm now. Bad punnage will do that. sorry.

So. This all started about a month ago at an ophthalmologist’s office after waiting a painful amount of time in a quiet, poorly-lit room. The only entertainment was a red container of these towels, and prone as I am to fits of absurdity, I started cackling and generally cracking up because the ones we use in our dental practice are green, and of course I noticed the name of these things for the first. time. evah. Red. Green. Sani-Cloth.

*chortle*

*snort*

Sani-cloth. I’m a blind elf with a lisp. Does Sani-Cloth work with Hermey the elf? He wanted to be a dentist, not an optometrist. Ho Ho Ho!

*hiccup*

And here’s the WORST. worst worst worst example of what happens when humor strikes at the wrong time.

I had thoughts about Sani-Cloth on July 4th.

Only problem was, that day, I was with my extended family in an ICU unit, and my dearest, most precious, 92 year old grandfather was in his last moments of life. Right there, I picked up the red canister that they used in the hospital room, just like in the ophthalmology office, just like in our dental practice, and gave an appropriate preface to the punchline. Then I delivered it.

Ummm. Awkward bomb.

But my grandfather, this joke was right up his alley.  He loved puns. In my mind I could hear his own special delight sound made to reward my well-paced dork moment.

Iz Zat You, Sani-Cloth?

I sang gently off-key, in Grandfather’s ear, with his hospital caregivers using the wipes to protect all of the armamentarium in the room from the ick of the world that we, his family, had probably brought with us when we were welcomed into this final sanctum.

He died just after midnight, a few hours later after I’d told him the last joke he would ever hear.

Thank you, Sani-Cloth, for your wet-wipe wellness, and for being at an absurd yet expected place at a sacred time. And thank you, Grandfather, for sharing your sense of humor.

*sniffle*

 

 

Also, a ton of gratitude goes to my cousin Greg for posting this video tribute to our grandfather on YouTube. And that first song? That was the one I just happened to be singing off-key in his ear at the hospital… 🙂

Filed Under: Anecdotes, Products Tagged With: christmas in July, disinfection, sani-cloth

Dental office acronyms

June 25, 2012 By Trish Walraven 3 Comments

One of my favorite dental blogs is the AGD’s The Daily Grind, with today’s post by Scott Jackson, DMD, MAGD sticking up like a wonderful, poignant nail that wants its head to be hit by this hammer of humor awareness. BAM! BAM! BAM!

In the midst of savoring life, Scott has also realized that textual shortcuts just might be the future of communicating in his dental practice, and so has offered up a few acronymic suggestions to ease the conversations in your office as well:

IGS……..I’m going to scream
WWIT…….What was I thinking?
DAPDA……Dog ate patient’s denture again
LCNHLTP….Lab case not here, lie to patient
IHDD…….I hate doing dentures
INAV…….I need a vacation
CTOSN……Call the oral surgeon, NOW!
IPTDS……I perforated the darn sinus
YAIOTP…..Your attorney is on the phone
INAGOW…..I need a glass of wine
SMAY…….Staff mad at you

There’s more!!!! but you’ll have to go here to read them, because that’s just how it works, this blogger thing. Borrow a few and it’s teasing and plugging. Take ’em all and it’s stealing. And if you have a hammer, well, aren’t you just supposed to hit nails on their heads when they make you smile with dental humorosity?

I now feel the urge to add a witty acronym of my own, but it would probably be something suckie uppie like:

SWTB……Scott writes them better.

 

 

Filed Under: Anecdotes, Humor, Practice Management Tagged With: dental acronyms, dental blogs, dental humor

Does your pedo blow?

June 19, 2012 By Trish Walraven 1 Comment

Here’s proof that pediatric dentistry attracts “special” people – the staff of Teays Valley Pediatric Dentistry and Huntington Pediatric Dentistry & Orthodontics getting it on and making the right kind of viral video, complete with outtakes. It’s got humor, it’s got sexy, it’s got “we didn’t try hard to get this just right.” And it works, because the following is just plain fun to watch:

So how about it? Does this video make you want to work with the crazy gals? Definitely. But what about sending your kids to become patients in this office? Lower your eyebrows and listen for a moment. You’re just seeing the tip of the insanity. They’ve probably done worse, much worse than gambled with candy. Children shouldn’t be exposed to irresponsibility of this magnitude, and so the parents should be made aware of this seedier side of pedodontics.

Do you remember the drug-induced rant of David After Dentist? To think that a dental professional would bring into question whether or not this was real life. We don’t need none of that existential nonsense. Pediatric dentists should stick to hiring dried up old biddies that don’t like kids. They may not have a lot of personality, but at least they’ll shine the light where you need it instead of dancing around pretending to be Ke$ha.



(just kidding. Party on, you instigators of fun.)

Filed Under: Fun, Practice Management Tagged With: dental humor, dental staff videos, pediatric dentistry, staff christmas parties

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DentalBuzz explores rising trends in dentistry with its own slant. The speed at which new products and ideas enter the dental field can often outpace our ability to understand just exactly the direction in which we are heading. But somehow, by being a little less serious about dentistry and dental care, we might get closer to making sense of it all.

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