Now… don’t let the title of this piece make you cower into your stinky underpants drawer.
My intention is to simply explain the importance of why you lovely patients must floss your teeth. After seven years of clinical experience and seeing the outcome of a non-flossing lifestyle, my hope is that those reading this highly important dental topic will gain the vital understanding of flossing and how gum disease will affect your life.
Let’s start by me asking for your full attention by you getting your crusty, Starbucks-stained teeth out of your $8.00 latte you really can’t afford but feel the urge to economically consume every, single morning before you go to your soon-to-be outsourced job that just increased your dental insurance premium for a minute because here’s what I have to tell you.
Are you ready? Good.
If you don’t floss your gums will become a festering, disease-ridden, smorgasbord of unrelenting bacteria that will ultimately make your gingivae bleed in buckets every, single day of your life. If you don’t floss your gums you will spend thousands (I’m not kidding) of dollars to simply control the incurable disease (and it is a disease) that you have let build up over years and years of utter neglect.
Exudate will ooze out from underneath your gums and after questioning by the clinical professional (How YOU doin’?) the finding(s) will be defined as ‘asymptomatic’. That is, you will feel no pain. What you will feel is the false sense of dental health with the perpetual lie you keep telling yourself when you think, “It doesn’t hurt,” while the blood-filled pus continues to bubble and percolate underneath your gums.
Allow me to continue.
Your social life will remain that of the lonely-lived bachelor/bachelorette whose breath completely, I mean, completely reeks so intensely, you will have no realistic chance of any dating prospects. You will continue to waste money on the premium whitening kits at your local store to give off the illusion of a healthy mouth in the hopes of attracting a mate. Your highly offensive, (Not joking. It’s awful.) metallic-smelling breath from your lack of flossing is so oppressive no one will want to kiss you nor come within five feet of you. (Yes. The odor is that strong.) And we can still smell it through the masks we wear. Sorry.
Once your teeth become mobile, or loose, from the lack of flossing and the prolific bacteria eating away at your bone that supports your teeth, then, and only then, will you notice and mention the finding to your dentist and/or dental hygienist. (Hey, that’s me!) You will hear the word ‘unsalvageable’. You may even hear the word ‘hopeless’. That means your loose tooth/teeth will have to be pulled out from your rotting mouth because you were lazy and didn’t floss.
You’ve just lost your tooth… which could have been prevented if you only had used that little piece of string.
Sleep tight.
Harsh. But at least you got it off your chest here so that you can be a little more PC with your patients so that they’ll listen to you. Or not. But at least they may pretend to listen. 🙂
You know me- potty mouth.
And, yes, I feel much better that’s off my chest. For readers who are new to the DB site I offer to you my disclaimer:
I write parody pieces. Parody: a humorous or satirical imitation of a serious piece of literature or writing. I do not and have never spoken to any patients in the above fashion since the inception of my dental career. I get frustrated and stupid at times is all. I mean no one harm of any kind. I’m just that kind of writer.
So if you don’t actually talk to patients that way that means that I shouldn’t have gone off on that person with the icky mouth yesterday? Oopsmybad.
Great article about flossing! You really point out what can happen to people who don’t floss more often. 🙂
I don’t think this would go over well with my patients but I can understand how you feel! Flossing is such a simple task that can make your overall oral health so much better for years to come. It’s frustrating when you can’t convince your patients but all we can do is keep pushing the importance of flossing (minus the f bombs maybe).
Very well written. It is a battle every day with some patients. They just do not get it. But in my opinion its far better than it used to be.
I just wanted to say that I have been a notorious non-flosser my entire life. My dentists/ hygienists have always told me to floss, but I never fully comprehended why I needed to, plus I had this fear that I could rip off chunks of my gum or damage my teeth (stupid, I know, but it just seems so aggressive). Your article, combined with a super awesome hygienist I met yesterday, has helped me understand why it’s so important! Thank you and I promise I will floss from now on!
Article has good information even If the op seems but hurt